Hey guyyyys-

Hope everyone is enjoying this nice weather we’ve been having.  The warmth, the sunny skies, flowers in bloom, Michael Cogdill’s facial mole.

But with the good comes the bad.  Nine is on the loose and young men’s backside should be on guard.  The Badonkadonk Bandit is out on the prowl.  You see, I have known Nine for 11 or 12 years, since he was 14.  He’ll never admit, but I have been a father figure to the guy – or at least an older, handsome brother.  I have spoke to him in private about this but it seems to not have helped.  So, I ask you, the P1 Family to help.  Please look at the documentation below.  Nine is in love with the male hockey box.

That’s Nine and JLN in one of our production studios.  Are they wrestling?  Nope.  That’s how Nine greets a man in lieu of a handshake or fist bump. 

Need more evidence?  Dateline Spartanburg, SC – TRG Big Ass Draft Night at Lil D’z.  Faybay is doing a live break on the air.  Seeing FooBoo for the first tme, Ninny goes over to say hello to him – and this is what happened.

If you see Nine and he tells you that your collar is popped and he’ll fix it.  Or you have a bug on your back and he’ll knock it off.  BEW ARE!  He may very well be trying to invade your cheeks.

And we shall,

-Maffew

TickleItGuys.com
facebook.com/themaffew

Hey guys-

The Pussification Of America-Scene 2: The Kids of America

Our generation (meaning Generation X) will be the last of it’s kind. And I’m totally good with that. I’m glad to be part of the defining generation. What the hell are you talking about Maffew? Well, I shall explain and I shall.

The sport of baseball goes out with our generation. Not professional ball exactly, but in a way yes. My parents (the baby boomer generation) grew up with baseball as America’s past time. It is now football. And of course around here, the national past time is high school football-but I’m talking nationally. But back to baseball, when I was a kid I played little league baseball. I played for the San Souci Paladins (yeah we ripped off Furman.) Every kid in my neighborhood played on the team. And when we didn’t have games, we practiced until dark. Jesus, I feel like Kevin Arnold from The Wonder Years narrating his life. But it was true. We played baseball and loved the hell out of it. Now, kids don’t like baseball. They want to play soccer. And that’s cool. Not making fun of soccer kids, in fact I’m a big fan of soccer moms. But this is the little league Soccer Generation.

We played to win. If we lost, we were pissed and usually so were our Dads. It taught me life lessons. Play hard. Some sensitive types say, “Oh Maffew, you can’t get down on your kids if they don’t win.” I’m not saying you ground them or spank their ass, but look at it like this is your kid gets a D on their Algebra test, you’d probably sit down with them and figure out how to get a C. Team sports gave me friends for life because we struggled to win together. And as a former football player at Wade Hampton, I can tell you I know the struggle. Today, in some leagues, they don’t even keep score! Because that would be calling a kid a LOSER. How are these kids supposed to be raised to think everybody wins. In a perfect world, everybody would be super rich, awesome healthcare, 4 day weekends, etc, etc. But that’s not life. It’s the Pussification of America, people! When we’re not making them get off the PS3 to go outside and play-we’re telling them now matter what, you’re a winner! But they’re nnnnnnnnnnnnot! It will great affect them when they hit high school and go into college and eventually the infamous “real world.”

And think about this: How can Shawn Michaels be in Degeneration X when he’s a baby boomer?

Tickle It Guys,
-Maffew-

TickleItGuys.com
twitter.com/theriseguys
facebook.com/theriseguys
facebook.com/themaffew

What’s up pissies?

2 good movies out there that you need to go see.  Bruno and The Hangover.  The Hangover has been out for a while, bust a must see.  More about that flick in just a second.

I went to see Bruno with Nine and Faybay.  Nine and I agree Bruno is much better than Borat.  FooBoo as usual, disagreed with us.  I don’t want to give away too much but Bruno actually interviews a real terrorist.  I believe he’s in bed with Bin Laden somehow.  Amazing Sasha Baron Cohen had the balls to do it.  I wholeheartedly believe Cohen is one of the Top comedians of our time.

Back to The Hangover, I said on the show how much I liked that movie.  P1 Bikini Bottom sent me a link to the following video saying The Hangover is a ripoff of Dude, Where’s My Car?

Slightly.  Maybe.

I’ll be back next time with Chapter 10. Until then, F**KS MY CAR?

-Maffew

http://www.tickleitguys.com/

https://twitter.com/maffew933

https://twitter.com/theriseguys

http://facebook.com/theriseguys

What’s up pissies?

Make plans to join us Friday night.  It’s a Rise Guys Big Ass Draft TOGA party.  We’ll be in togas (and hope you are too) at Little D’s on Fernwood Glendale Road in Spartanburg from 8-10 THIS Friday night (June 26th).  First time, we’ve had a BAD Night in Sparkle City in a long, long time.  Faybay hates Spartanburg, but we’re making him go.  He says there’s a lot of crime there so I have him a bullet proof vest to wear.

Over at TickleItGuys.com (the official website of The Rise Guys) we have a brand new Rise Girl.

That’s Ashley Nicole, our newest Rise Girl.  Check out all 62 pics of here at TickleItGuys.com

Speaking of girls, Perez Hilton finally got his.